Caterpillars, Cocoons and Butterflies

I've been thinking about butterflies lately. They have such a strange journey through life...starting as a caterpillar, spending time wrapped in a cocoon, and finally emerging better and more beautiful in the end.

I feel like I spent my 9 months of pregnancy as an ugly caterpillar: slow, hairy, putzing around on the ground trying not to get eaten alive (by my kids), eating slowly all day long (to try to keep the nausea at bay), and getting bigger and bigger and bigger... I wonder what a caterpillar feels like once he's wrapped up in his cocoon. Does his reality of life change because his entire store of energy is being used to create something that hasn't existed before? In these terms, is developing wings all that different than developing a child?

Oh, and what a beautiful day it must be for him when he breaks out of his cocoon and lets his wings dry in the warm sunlight, staring the world in the eye. Eventually he takes off into the air - experimenting with his wings and experiencing something he never has before.

I can relate to this.

What a journey my sweet little Miles has led me through! After he was born, while my wings were still wet, my kids and I spent a lot of time hanging on to our own little cocoon - reading books, playing trains, making crafts, bouncing on the yoga ball, watching Disney movies, dancing to various CD's... But now, my wings have finally dried and I feel ready to soar through the world again! I feel ready to ease back into my normal routines of library story times, parks, projects, church callings, e-mail, blogging, chores and making dinner. Experiencing life with three beautiful children under my care...something I've never done before.

And, I feel beautiful inside.