Wednesday, January 7, 2009

A Day to go Down in History

I find it fascinating how easily a mother's life revolves around her children. Sometimes I go through phases where I try to reconnect with my pre-mothering self, or try to reground my personality in just myself and God - but I realize, time and time again, that a little piece of my heart is in each child...and their beautiful personalities are woven through and through my own so much that it's impossible to separate one from another. I believe that my emotions will always revolve around their lives and their happiness - and how wonderful that, in this breath of time, my whole life is physically revolving around them, too.

Maybe that's why I was so thrilled when I felt my baby move for the first time tonight. I just love thinking about her cute little hands, and her cute little feet, and the masses and masses of hair she will have when she's born, and those long, dark eyelashes, and that beautiful, beautiful face....... No, we don't know if it's a boy or a girl, but McKenzie and I are rooting for a girl and since I write this blog, I get to impose my wishes on it. :) And, if the baby is anything like McKenzie, she won't have any real hair until well past her first birthday...but again, my blog. It's been so fun to cheer for a girl with McKenzie - she's kind of in this 'girl power' phase, and I guess I'm feeding into it a little bit. (I just hope she won't be too disappointed if the results come back in favor of a boy.)

What a great ray of light for me tonight, feeling that little nudge. I put on my favorite pair of pants this morning and sighed when I realized that, no matter how hard I pulled, tucked, squeezed or yanked, that blasted button was not going to make it. So, I got out the elastic band to hold it together and felt a little twinge of defeat as I succumbed to my fate for the next few months. I lathered concealer all over my face and, still, those little red blotches shined right through like they were the star of the party (sadly, even in Beautimus...I've made a point to not look in Wretchimus for the next long while). I try not to let my physical appearance dictate my mood for the day...but sometimes it does - so it was great to feel a little nudge of encouragement from my little one, to help me remember exactly why I'm doing this. :)

9 comments:

  1. That is so exciting that you felt the baby! That was about the only thing for me that was fun! I am very gald that you are feeling better, and that things seemed to be going well! Can't wait to know what that baby is! :)

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  2. I have to say that that is the only thing I felt regret about when I knew (really really knew!) I was never going to be pregnant again--that I would never feel a baby move inside of me again. Enjoy those feelings!

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  3. I love that feeling too and I remember after Eric was born, I had gas or something and I felt so sad when I realized it was not the baby moving! And I love that your shower door is fuzzy!

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  4. Feeling the baby move is one of my favorite things about being pregnant. Feeling it the first time makes all the sickness seem worth it. I am almost sad to loose the baby moving inside me when they are born. After my first, Amber, was born I kept feeling thing move back into place and it was a little weird to think that it wasn't her cause it. I will help you cheer for a girl:)

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  5. Yup, feeling the baby move is the best part of being prego. I remember being SOOOO sick with Christiana and after I threw up the millionth time she kicked me....HARD! The others have been nice movements, but her's was a big kick. As for if its a boy, we've been there. When we found out Jonathan was going to be a boy (we were like you rooting for a girl) Christiana cried. She sat down in the doc office and cried saying she already had a brother. It was really cute, but after about a day she was all excited to have a new brother.

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  6. I love the updated stuff on the side of your blog! Your kids are so dang funny. I can't imagine feeling SOMEONE move INSIDE of you. What a bizzare thing! Can't wait to find out what it is.

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  7. How exciting! I love when you can feel their wiggles, letting you know they're really there! You look great by the way, I wouldn't worry about the mirror twins ;)

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  8. Anonymous1:06 PM

    I remember that feeling. It always seems real when you feel the baby move. congrats again.

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  9. Man, I am so very out of the loop! I didn't even know you were expecting. Congratulations!

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