Memorial Day - Visiting Jess

On the way home from the Valley of Fire, we decided we'd stop into the mountains of Brian Head for a little extra family time. Two and a half hours in the exact opposite direction of Home. Because, why not?

We arrived on Saturday night and stayed in a little cabin where we cuddled under blankets and watched the relatively new Cinderella movie. The kids were thrilled to see that there was snow outside and when they went to pick it up they didn't even mind that it was all one giant mass of ice and dirt.

On Sunday morning in the parking lot after church, my phone buzzed with a text from my mother-in-law who had sent a picture of Jess's grave and headstone. She had cleaned it and decorated it with little blue and yellow flowers and had taken a picture to send to me. It's one of my favorite things about Jean.

Something about that picture pulled at me and minutes later we found ourselves driving three more hours in the exact opposite direction of Home just to sit by his headstone.

We were all still dressed in our church clothes, we had no food, no entertainment, and Brian didn't even have his wallet. Yet there we were. And the kids were on board with the only request being that we made sure to stop to gather flowers along our way.

So we pulled over on the side of the road when we got close and gathered our favorites.

When we arrived we were met with the peace that lives there among those headstones.

And especially among the headstones marking the tiniest plots of land for the babies and children.

I found myself feeling very grateful for the caretakers of the land... the grass is always so thick and beautiful, and although that might have very little to do with the eternal nature of our family, it sure makes it pleasant to sit near Jess's resting place and remember.

Timothy traced his fingers through Jess's name as we told him the story of his brother.

We are generally not very spontaneous people.  I like to plan ahead and feel a bit stressed when my plans change or get interrupted.  But it felt good this time to throw our plans to the wind and take a seven hour detour to 'stop in' and remember how blessed we are to have Jess in our lives.

And when we had done what we'd come to do, we gathered back into the car and drove back down to Brian Head to continue the rest of our vacation.

A little happier.
A little sadder.
A little more rich in love and family.
And a little more splintered as we left him behind.

But, of course, we didn't really leave him behind. I suppose, in a way, you could say that Heavenly Father asked him to leave us behind. To make us better people, and to give us even more of a reason to keep our covenants. To disrupt our vacation plans - and life plans - every so often to give us something better.

Memorial Day - Camping in the Valley of Fire

Don't you wish you could balance tent poles on your head? Yeah. Me neither. But Kenz was excessively proud of herself, so we gave her lots of fake praise.

The Valley of Fire is one of my favorite places to camp. It's different, to be sure, than the mountain camping that I'm used to, but this place has so much magic and charm that I can overlook its lack of green and water.

Can you spot the kids in the picture above? We were so lucky to get a campsite with so many fun places to climb and explore.  We almost didn't see the children after we got there - which was unnerving and awesome at the same time because, lots of danger and lots of freedom.

The rocks have so many cracks and tunnels and pockets for them to climb and explore.

And there are no shortage of rocks, so once they've conquered one, they're on to the next.

It gives them such a sense of accomplishment and pride.

Timothy went straight to work cutting our firewood.

And I don't know what it is about nature, but how sweet it is that everyone seems to get along so well once we are there.

Honestly, I talk about it as if it's the kids who love to climb the rocks, and it is, but I love it too.  I remember as a kid traveling down to St. George and climbing all over the red rocks there. I felt I had died and gone to heaven. I'm sure that's what my kids are feeling when they're doing the same thing.

We had good friends go with us - the Bacons came along with all of their family, and then we had Chandler come along with us. Poor Chandler got sick in the night and threw up all over his sleeping bag and hair. We didn't have much to be able to clean it up with, but he was a good sport and assured us over and over that he felt fine and that it was probably just a result from eating too many s'mores.

A Miles sized hole.

It's taken me a little while to appreciate the desert - and I still feel like I have further to go - but being out in the Valley of Fire sure helps that cause. It is truly beautiful to me.

Please come stay awhile!

I know, this is so gross.  We find flies in our pool fence all the time and I never really know what to do with them.  I've ignored them and they seem to disappear eventually.  Maybe the birds get them?  Anyway, that has nothing to do with the rest of this post other than the fact that I took that picture while my brother Brian was visiting us.

Speaking of which, my brother Brian came to visit us!

I've always had a special place in my heart for my brother.  He and I seem to be cut from the same mold.  And even though he is five years younger than me (which felt like lifetimes apart when we were children and teens) he and I always seemed to stand together whenever we siblings paired off in the home.  As much as I loved to stand together with him as a child, I love even more standing together with him as an adult.

He is a hilarious person.  Whenever I see a text from him on my phone, I start smiling before I even open it because I know it's going to make me happier than I already was. Plus, he's so kind and thoughtful. Just last week he landed in the emergency room after eating a hidden walnut and felt terrible that he took up a bed for eight hours when the waiting room was so full.  "I had some IV's going," he told me later, "but I'm sure they could have found one of those wheely things to attach them to, and I could have gone out to the waiting room with it."

We had a water balloon fight, and swam in the pool.  And I totally love this picture.  I told Brian to tuck his legs when he jumped.  Nailed it.

A little bit later, the Paxtons came to visit.  And they brought their dog, Molly.  She was the star of the show for the few days and, I have to admit, for not being a dog person she was actually pretty fun for me to have around, too.

We took her everywhere we went, and she was a happy companion.

Timothy fell in love with her and I felt my heart pulling to get a dog just so I could see that sweet happy face.  But then I remembered that they poop.  So I'll have to think about it again.

We took the Paxtons to see the Hoover Dam and snuck Molly along with us.  Apparently you're not really supposed to bring dogs along on the little hike across the bridge.  But we couldn't leave her in the car, of course, and decided that she was small enough to just carry the whole way.

Then my college roommate came to visit.  I hadn't seen Becky in years... like six of them... and it was a breath of fresh air.  I love Becky.

She's the one who taught me how to listen to my own feelings.  She asked me 'why' when I told her I was frustrated, and she asked me 'how' when I told her I wanted to change something about myself.  Truthfully, I probably couldn't have escape my pensive personality in the long run anyway, but Becky was the catalyst who brought it front and center.  It has made my life richer.  Just like she does.

We went to hang out at the Lake Mead Marina - we ate incredibly greasy french fries that tasted amazing, and a delicious turkey, avacado chicken wrap that I've thought about a few times since.  At the end of our three hour lunch, we asked for ice water to fill our waterbottles and ended up with two full waterbottles and four large plastic cups full of water just for the two of us.  "Geez," Becky said as we loaded our arms, "how much water does one person need?!  Where's the bathroom?"

That night we traveled into town to catch a few shows at the Bellagio, which never disappoints.  We watched four shows before we decided, at 11:50pm, that we should probably start making our way back home.

The next morning we took a tour of the Hoover Dam and watched the water from my waterbottle defy gravity.

Becky is such a happy person for me to hang around!

I absolutely love that Vegas is such an easy place to visit and that I have so many wonderful friends and family who are happy and willing to make the trek. Visitors make me happy.

The Great Ward Party

How many ward parties deserve their own blog post? Seriously, this ward party was that amazing. One of the families in our ward owns an old mine out in the middle of the desert that is about as fun as anything. The Werley Mine, it's called, and as I've gotten to know the Werley's over the last couple of years they have become some of my favorite people that I want to know better.

So when we heard that our ward party was going to be held out there, we jumped at the chance to go.  My brother was visiting at the time, so he tagged along and had a great time, too.

The Werleys have several old fashioned buses that they've gutted and turned into something truly fabulous.

We all took turns going on little rides through the bumpy desert. And, let me tell you, those things can off-road!



No seatbelts, steep climbs, scary descents, and laughter like you wouldn't believe!  After most of the ward went home, a few of us stayed for a VIP tour through the brand new part of their mine that was almost ready to open to the public. First, we piled in the buses and drove to the site which, in my opinion, might have been the most fun of the whole super fun night.

Eventually we veered off road and my already strained ability to take unfuzzy pictures completely disappeared as the bus rocked and jumped and bumped through the roads.

We climbed out of the buses and then down into the mine. 

And then down further into the mine.

We got the stories of how they cleaned it all up and what they found.  We heard the story of the time one of the Werley's flashlights went out as he was clearing a section of the tunnel and he was left in pitch blackness for much longer than he would have liked before one of his sons finally went out looking for him. We stopped at the little underground lake and marveled at the stillness of the water and air around it. We walked alongside the Calverts and since Alan happens to be a bat scientist, we laughed at him as he enjoyed his search for bat dung.

When we got back to the buses it was after dark and we finally made our way home. Tired and happy.

The Man

Me, my handsome man, and my giant bug glasses heading into Lowe's for a bit of a birthday shopping spree.  Which, really, was not a spree at all since we didn't actually buy anything (except a refill of floor cleaner) but felt like a spree because we were looking at carpet and glancing at kitchen cupboards and thinking about paint colors and shelving and molding and fireplace tile and power tools and patio furniture and all the other things a magical place like Lowe's makes one think about.

Once upon a month or two ago it was my birthday, and also March Madness.

So we got all dressed up (Alder style of course) and headed out for a night out on the town.  Brian and his phone took me to the Bellagio Gallery of Fine Art, which I had been eyeing for a year and a half.

It did not disappoint.  Currently, it's featuring an artist by the name of Yousuf Karsh who, if you're like me and not super familiar with things of this nature, is an incredibly accomplished and famous portrait photographer.  He has taken hundreds of portraits of the most famous men and women in the last century.  I wasn't sure how I was going to like the exhibit, to be honest, but it was absolutely incredible.  I don't know how he did it, but his pictures show life and passion.  60 of them are hanging in the Bellagio right this minute.  Pictures of people including Martin Luther King, Jr., Muhammad Ali, Albert Einstein, Audrey Hepburn, Fidel Castro, Helen Keller... it was inspiring.

Then we hung around downtown and ate the "Best Burger in Vegas" which was, I'll admit, a pretty dang good burger.  The best though?  Arguable.

I got lucky, you know.  Of course, at 20 years old I thought I was making a good choice.  I loved him and the future looked bright.  But how could I have known just how well this man would stay by my side and help actively lead our family to Today?  I love you, Bri.  You are a great man.  A great father, an incredible husband, a hard worker, a forgiving partner, and handsome all the way from the inside out.