Boycotting Bees

Carson is boycotting all bees at the moment because he got stung yesterday and felt that the bee was highly unjustified.

"I was *sob* just twying to howld the bee. I wasn't even *sob sob* twying to kiwll it. And *sob* it still stinged me."

His finger was double it's normal size by the time it stopped swelling.

Oh, Buddy. Too bad bees can't understand the difference between being lovingly squeezed to death, and maliciously squeezed to death...

You would think...

...that having an extra adult in the house over the weekend would help keep it clean.

But...


...that's never the case.


And believe me -


- you're only seeing a portion of it.


Welcome to my Monday mornings.

Might as well call me grandma...

...cause that's what I felt like while I was trying to navigate through Facebook earlier today. And, you wanna watch me type a text message? Pull up a good thick cushion and get comfy. I'll have your 5 word sentence out before you can say, "I can't believe it's taking you so long to write such a tiny sentence. Your fingers look like they're full of lead, and you really should think about putting some lotion on them...they are UG-LY!!! Speaking of ugly, I saw this old, scraggly three-legged cat on the side of the road eating a mouse today. It was kind of weird, 'cause I had just watched this documentary about wild lions in Africa and, you know, since cats and lions are part of the same family and all, it totally made me think of that - though, I'm pretty sure a cat couldn't take down a zebra...especially if the cat only had three legs! Wouldn't it be weird if we had three legs? We could, like, invent so many awesome new sports! Soccer would be .... oh! You're finished!"

So, you may be wondering why I'm thinking so much about texting and facebook right now. Well, you see, I've been called to the Young Womens organization in our church, and that means I'll be working directly with a bunch of 12-18 year old girls. I was shocked when I saw that the four questions the Young Women secretary needed from me were:

1) When is your birthday?
2) What is your cell number?
3) Do you text?
4) Are you on Facebook?

Oh boy.

I fear that facebook will start consuming my life...poking and gifting and gaming, and what the devil is Farmville? Remember how I just posted about finally being able to let things go? I can't help but feel like I'm going in the opposite direction, here. And, what about pictures? It seems a little redundant to put pictures up on the blog AND on facebook...do you do that?

Keeping up with status updates alone is a little overwhelming to me. It seems like every time I refresh my browser there are 3 more on there. If I don't check it for *gasp* a whole day, I'm dead meat... Does anyone want to guess how long I was just parked here on the couch surfing through facebook? 2 hours. HOURS. TWO of them!!! Did I mention the fact that I am literally sitting on a pile of laundry? (The couch is covered so I would fold it before I sat. Guess it didn't work.) Am I doing something wrong? Facebook and I have never meshed well. I've tried it valiantly two different times, and it almost seemed like I was adding another child into my life. There are just too many people to keep up with...too many lives to keep track of.

I guess I'm just concerned I won't be able to do it all when I have this cute little guy to keep up with...


...and this sweet 6-year-olds birthday party to blog about...


...and when I have to convince this little guy that he's not actually a princess, even though he is wearing the lip-gloss...


This is my life! This is what I want to be my life! Hmmmm....sounds like I'm babbling and floundering a little here. (This is what I call brain-vomit. Spitting everything out without editing or much thinking. Good for you for keeping up with me to this point!)

I guess it means it's time to find a new balance.

Any facebook lovers who have some advice on how NOT to let it consume your life?

Well, it's about time I start getting into the here-and-now. I guess if I don't keep up, I'll never be able to catch-up when my kids are old enough to be going through it. I have a feeling facebook and texting are only the beginning......

Blasted Bug

24 hour unmerciful stomach bug...................
5 affected people...............................................
3 long days.........................................................
8 pairs of underwear for Carson.....................
2 pairs of underwear for Kenzie......................
2 overworked toilets.........................................
1 blue throw-up bucket....................................
+ 32 hours of television...............................................
---------------------------------------------------------
1 happy mom that it's all over

You can see my 3 sick kids on the front couch, my little sick-hub on the back couch, and Brian had just sent a message from work saying that he was sick, too. Poor guy had to power through it at work while the rest of us watched movies all day. We didn't have enough throw-up buckets for all of us (and I'm totally opposed to letting the kids throw up in a bowl that I actually use for cooking - my brain can't get around the mental image of vomit-slop in the bowl I'm tossing a salad in), but thankfully some of us could make it to the toilet in time...and we were mostly in different stages of agony anyway, so we didn't all need it at once.

How was your week?

Letting it go

"You love to eat dirt!" I tease Carson as we try to decide what to have for a mid-morning snack.
"NO!!! I DON'T like to eat duht!" he insists.
"Yummmm, yummmmm, yummmmmy! I'll go get a bunch of dirt right now for your snack!"
"NOOOOOO!" He's still smiling, but also a little concerned that this may not be a joke.

I pull down the chocolate powder to make him a cocoa-baba (chocolate milk) and say, "Here's the dirt! Hand me your cup, please, and I'll fill it up with spoonfuls of this yummy, yummy dirt."

His look is priceless...a mixture of relief and excitement.
"Dat's not duht!"
"It's not?"
"NO!!! I eat duht from under mine fingernails, though."

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One of the best pieces of advice I got in anticipation of my third baby was, "You just have to learn how to let things go."

I didn't really get it...what could be let go in my life? My children needed to eat - - - my house needed to be cleaned - - - my laundry needed to be done - - - what could be cut out? Now, 7 months into this baby #3 thing, I get it.

I have papers on my microwave that have built their own little community and have no intent on ever leaving.

There's a 2X1 foot square in the corner of my dining room that the vacuum can't reach unless I change outlets in the middle of my vacuuming...I don't think that square has been vacuumed for 7 months now. And I've all but forgotten the hose attachment...I think all the tiny scraps of paper and little dirt clumps have figured out that their safe place is anywhere they can hug a wall. The same piece of paper you noticed last time you came over will be there next time...and the next...and the next.

There's a layer of dust collecting on my mantle that is getting so high I can see it from a sitting position on my couch.

We have pancakes or quesidillas for dinner at least one night a week, and leftovers for another two.

My plants get watered when they're sagging so low their leaves brush the ground.

I can actually see the crumbs underneath the stove, and dust bunnies keep flying out from under the couches and entertainment stand.

And...my kids eat dirt out from underneath their fingernails.

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Yesterday, we had company coming in to stay the night. An old BYU friend interviewing for residencies around the country. I washed the sheets on the guest bed for him, and scrubbed the toothpaste remnants out of the bathroom sink. I picked up the bits of scattered toilet paper, put the extra stepping stools in the closet, and wiped the yellow spots off of the toilet (boys!). Just as I was turning my back on a job done well enough, I glanced at the white towels I have hanging on the towel rack. I quickly did a double-take and remembered what I had seen a few days before: a yellowish-green, crusty snot smear spanning 5 inches across the middle of the bright white towel.

Um, gross.

It was in this moment that I reached a new level of 'letting it go'. Generally, I would whip that towel into the washing machine before you could count to ten...but I didn't have time for that, and I didn't really have the energy for that either. So, I picked the towel up, turned it around, and slipped it back over the towel rack.

Out of sight, out of mind.

I only hope our guest didn't wipe his hands on that towel - he most certainly would have found the hidden crustiness.

-----------------------

I've learned that life kind of prioritized itself. The things that REALLY bug me are getting done...the beds are made every day, and the rooms are tidy. There are usually no shoes in the middle of my floor, and the TV is usually closed behind the entertainment center doors. Our clothes make it into the laundry hamper and there are no toys on my kitchen floor (crumbs and sometimes giant pieces of food, yes...but no toys).

AND - I still get to play with my kids and feed them, too. :)

Attn: All Private Bloggers

Somehow, in the hustle and bustle of Christmas and layout changes, I lost all of my private blog links. I've been meaning to go through all of my comments to find you (don't you just love the fact that every time a comment is made, the name of the commenter is a link to their blog!), but when I started today I realized that it was going to take forever. (You really should comment more!) :) And I know I've deleted some of the actual invitations out of my e-mail...so that wouldn't help.

Fortunately, I can keep up with you through blogging but, unfortunately, it's sometimes the only way I keep up with you...and it makes me sad to think I've lost someone! So, if you've sent me an invitation to your blog (or have been meaning to), will you please leave a comment here so I can get your blog address again? I miss you all and want to know how your month has been! You don't even have to say anything in your comment...just a simple 'hey' will do!

And, if you happen to be reading this months after I actually posted it, still reply! I'll get it in my e-mail. (I've noticed that many private bloggers tend to check other blogs less frequently...so I'll be expecting you later!)

Thanks!

Forgetfulness...

Sometimes, I swear my memory has narcolepsy. It will forget to wake up with me at the beginning of the day, and then spontaneously switch on and off at the most inconvenient times. It's on these days that I usually create extra problems I then have to solve.

Yesterday was a memory narcolepsy day which provided not one, but two, opportunities for me to refine my problem-solving skills...fortunately, lady luck chose to be my companion. It started before I even opened my eyes with a panicky sob from my 5 year old, "Mom! Mom! Mom!" She came running into my room just as my eye-lids were reluctantly separating. "Honey, what's wrong?" I groggily asked. "My...my...*sob*...my-tooth-is-not-under-my-pillow-anymore-and-there-isn't-any-money-there-either!"

Oh dear.
That forgetful Tooth Fairy forgot to make an appearance.

Thankfully, the kids were obedient and sat on my bed while I went to go 'investigate' (they couldn't come with me, you see, because Miles was still sleeping in their bedroom and it needed to stay extra quiet). What do you know?! That silly tooth fairy left the money under one of the other pillows on her bed! I guess McKenzie's head must have been right on the edge of her pillow and the Tooth Fairy couldn't squeeze the money in under it! As for the missing tooth? Well, luckily McKenzie just didn't happen to see that it was still sitting directly under the middle of her pillow. I'm still not sure how she missed it... but, she was thrilled to pull up the other pillow and see that the Tooth Fairy did, indeed, remember her.


The next little while seemed to go on without much of a hitch. I got McKenzie ready just in time for our neighbor to pull in our driveway to take her to school. "See you a little earlier today!" I called out to our neighbor. I wanted to make sure she remembered I'd be dropping her little girl off just after the early release of 1:30.

1:40 came along, and I was parked on the couch finishing up some e-mail when my friend, Katie, called, "Hey, Linds. Are you already through the carpool line? Did you already get McKenzie?" My eyes shot to the clock, "Oh-my-gosh!" I exclaimed. "I TOTALLY forgot!!! No! I'm still sitting in my house - - - I am so glad you just called me right now - - - early release wasn't even on my radar!" She asked if I could pick up her boys for her, and I flew out the door dragging a shoe-less Carson, carrying a just-awoken-hungry Miles, and leaving an unfinished e-mail on the computer.

It actually ended up being a good thing, though, because Katie and I decided to meet at a park to play away the afternoon.

I'm not sure exactly why I love this so much...it kind of looks like a picture that would be on the front of a fairy-tale book...with the dark forest in the background...

I seriously love this little guy's hair! Look how red it is - and that sweet little curl that's sticking up in the middle of his head...precious!

All I really need on days like that is a good nights sleep - sleep somehow reboots the system. Hopefully I won't be forgetting other important things in the next little while...

But, I'm not making any guarantees.

Kamikaze Acorns

"Ready, set, GO!" I yell from the safety of my doorway. The kids, who were huddled around my legs, dash down the steps and run full speed to the van. They have already decided that McKenzie will slide the door open - - - this makes sense because her long legs make it inevitable that she will reach the door first. As they jump into the van, I glance down one last time at Miles, kicking in his car-seat, and pull the sunshade over his little body. Picking up the diaper bag, my car keys and the heavy car-seat, I step out onto the first step, close the door behind me, duck my head, and clumsily wobble to the car as fast as I can with my heavy load.

I breathe a sigh of relief as I slide into the drivers-seat and bask for a moment in our victory. *plunk* The moment is brief, however, for after a few passing seconds, *plunk* the sound of acorns hitting the top of the van, fills our ears. *plunk........plunk plunk*

Kamikaze Acorns.

------------

It's windy. Brian and I are just about to plop into bed when a strong gust of wind blows through the trees outside sending sheets of acorns down on our house. It sounds like heavy rain on a tin roof as they hit, then like rolling marbles on a tile floor as they roll down to the roof's edge, and then like mad, wrestling squirrels as they fall into the crunchy leaves below.

We stand there, in the middle of our room staring wordlessly into each others wide, surprised eyes. "I don't remember this happening last year," I say anxiously.
"Me neither," he replies.
"Do you think we were supposed to, like, treat the trees with some sort of something that might make them not produce so many acorns?" (After several 'we're-supposed-to-do-what' moments concerning home ownership over the last year, it was an honest, legit question.)
"Nah," he says reassuringly, "I remember an article from CNN last year about how there was an eerily low supply of acorns last fall. Maybe this is normal and last year was abnormal." It becomes clear to me at this point that I have married a nerd. He actually read an article about acorns...and remembered it a year later. After laughing at him for a few minutes, he pulls up the actual article and, sure enough, there apparently was a shortage of acorns last year.

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Yes, they may be small and look like harmless little squirrel snacks, but trust me, when you hear those acorns free-falling from 75 feet in the air, you'd better take cover...

...and hope that next year will bring about the same eerie deficit in acorns as the last.

Almost there... allllmoooost theeeerrrrrre...

All those years! - - - all those years of trying valiantly (and mostly unsuccessfully) to keep that blasted tenth commandment. Don't worry, I haven't been coveting my neighbors wife, or his house, or his donkey...

...but, his camera.

It seems as if those big, black, beautiful chunks of SLR wonderfulness are popping up around the necks of all my friends. I watch those friends as they press the shutter-button, and I try to funnel a bit of that magical shutter sound into my own ears.

You know, Brian has actually had a paying job for over a year now, and we've been saving those scarce extra pennies any time we get the chance. And, last month, as I transferred some more funds into our savings account I thought to myself, "It's time." Time to do something completely selfish - - - indulge one of my fantasies and cradle my very own SLR camera.

Excitement!

In addition to my new camera, I decided to splurge just a bit more and take a photography class at the community college in town. Again, completely and indulgently selfish. I admit that I have no true ambition to become a professional photographer...nor will I ever aspire to make every shot perfect. I love my point-and-shoot camera, and I'm sure it will continue to live in my purse (okay, okay...diaper bag - - - I have no purse) and snap the majority of my pictures. But I utterly long to have a camera capable of taking breathtaking pictures. Scenery, flowers, my babies, my family... oh! the daydreams are endless!

And then...

Last week, Brian came in from mowing the lawn and said, "Linds, our yard smells like crap. Literally." Sure enough, one step outside and a whiff later, I realized that something was terribly, grotesquely wrong with our septic system. The amount of money forked out so that the septic people could rip up my beautiful lawn ended up throwing out the idea of a camera and photography classes for a while.


Excitement quickly turned into tearful disappointment.

But, then again, there are some good things about this situation, I suppose. It's a good thing I'd been saving up money in the first place so we could actually afford to pay the septic guys (and believe me, they deserve the money! Watching them muck around in our 'crappy' water for an afternoon was enough to make me want to offer them a nice, hot shower and some clean clothes and boots afterward!)... And it's a good thing that it was just a moderate problem, or we would have had to pay thousands more... And it's a good thing we don't have to threaten the kids with their lives anymore NOT to play in the fun, stinky mud puddle... And it's a good thing I love my point-and-shoot so much, and that I can still get really good pictures out of it... And it's a good thing that our bellies are always full and our beds are always dry, and our 'waste' has somewhere to go, because I guess that's more important than being able to take awesome pictures, anyway...

So, here's to working septic systems... and a few more months of waiting.

It's time...

I woke up last Sunday morning, looked into the mirror and cursed the skin around my eyes - for the millionth time - for being so sensitive to tears. As I started working on the puffy redness, I felt a strange sort of calmness... it was done. The final goodbye's had been said, and Meg's plane had landed safely in their new home clear across the country.

It's been The Summer of Tearful Goodbye's for me. My Grandmother passed away; my entire family, spread through three visits, ended their visits in tears, and three of my dearest, dearest girl friends moved their entire families across the country to Washington, Utah, and San Diego.

There was no way I was going to get my eyes looking normal for church, so I decided to carry the red puffiness with a thankful heart that day...thankful that I had such dear people in my life whose absence could create such sorrow.

You have heard about my grandma, and you will hear about my family visits, but as for my friends... I believe there's a certain kind of bond that is formed among people when they go through life experiences together. A bond of understanding; a bond of love; a bond that somehow surpasses 'friend'ship and almost reaches 'soul'ship. When I first moved to North Carolina, our little family had just started to grow. We were young and vulnerable and still experimenting with who we were as parents and as a family unit. Over the past few years, we have become more grounded; we have made solid foundations and decisions that have started moving our family in a sure direction...and we have done it alongside some of the greatest people in the world. We have shared our ideas, our goals, our advice... Best friends, moving forward together, growing together as small tree trunks, becoming one with time.

It's no wonder that my heart hurts right now. When such a dear friend moves away, the raw edges of the separation are painful. I've learned so many things about friendship and service from these friends - and it's hard to know that I don't have their examples close to me anymore.

But, who is it that said, "It's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all." And how blessed I feel that I live in a day when a few thousand miles can't stop communication.

Cami, Brooke and Meg - you all deserve your own posts...yet my blogging efficiency has somehow become quite low... please know how much I love you, and how much I miss you. It's just not quite the same around here anymore...