Scattered Fall

 1) You are Staring into the Face of a Detainee

Not long ago, this boy ended up in DOUBLE detention. 

The double part was not (all the way) intentional, and Timothy had a rough few days over it all. He got in trouble for behaving disruptively while a substitute teacher was in charge of his math class (apparently he and some other boys were jump-scooting their desks and chairs forward (while still sitting in them)). It's a long story that took us a few days to get to the bottom of, but the end result was that there was a little misbehavior on his part and a little misunderstanding on the administrators part that led to apologies coming from both sides. 

Getting in trouble like this feels big for him because he's just generally such a good kid. But we all know that good kids get in trouble, too. Carson got detention in High School one day for climbing a forbidden ladder on the theater stage, and Miles for getting in a small food fight in the cafeteria that ended with a ketchup packet hitting the principal in the face.

It happens.

2) If You Can't Beat 'em, Join 'em

Miles plays the piano as often as he can, and, since he is doing school mostly from home, he can a lot. My dream to have our home filled with music has been realized! And also, Brian and I find ourselves questioning our decision to put the baby grand in the middle of our living space on the daily as he pounds out those high-energy songs for hours a day. 

Let me tell you, there comes a time when the Entertainer is not so entertaining.

But a good set of noise canceling headphones helps take the edge off and calms my nervous system when it gets all ramped up, and I know from experience that I will miss this music when he moves on from the house, just like I miss Carson's constant whistling/humming/singing. So, bring it on, Miles! Play, play, play.

I decided to jump in and learn the Nutcracker with him for Christmastime, and it's one of my favorite things to sit next to him on that bench because we laugh almost more than we play. Out of all of Miles's strengths, one of my very favorites is that he is a great companion.

2) Banana Bread

Somehow we ended up with 40 bananas in the house at one point this month. Which was a whole lotta bananas. But we put them to good use. Also, apparently banana bread is a 'thing' right now? Or maybe it was a thing? I can't keep up, but a reel went viral somewhere and banana bread became more than just banana bread in the eyes of the Possessed-by-Social-Media adolescent humans.

This? It's just banana bread.

4) "Mom, take my picture!"

Ah, one of my favorite phrases coming from the kids. Eliza wanted to know what she looked like in this particular situation, and since all she could see was the bottom of the cups, she needed assistance. 

It's interesting for me to think about how, when I was her age, the thought of me being able to see what I looked like with two cups in front of my eyes wouldn't have even crossed my mind. There was no possible instantaneous way to receive that information, so I would have just asked a friend to do it so I could see what they looked like.

Different world.

6) The Newest Obsession

A finger koala.

She lost it for a little while at school the other day, and in her distress a little boy named Nolan offered to buy her another one at the Shack with his Cobra Cash. Later, and unrelated, he gave her a tiny turtle, and Eliza has shyly (but excitedly) concluded that he must have a crush on her.

6) I Just Don't Understand...

This morning, I parked the car, grabbed my phone, exited the car, shut my door, walked around the car, opened her door, walked around her door, opened the front passenger door, climbed back into the car to grab my water bottle, exited the car a second time, shut my door, and was half way to the corner before Eliza had scooted her little body to the edge of her seat. 

WHAT TAKES HER SO LONG?!?!?!

Pretty sure Brian says the same thing about me.

7) Work Hard, Play Hard

If you scroll around in Carson's Google Photo album, you will see wide smiles and gorgeous scenery, hear deep belly laughing, and watch as forever friendships are, in real time, being etched into his heart. You will see cathedrals dating back to the 14th century, and castles dating back to the 12th, forests and trains and cities, and a few grey-haired nénis (nay-knees, a term for older women) who feed the missionaries as often as they can.

Looking in his album you might be tempted to think that he is on vacation, traveling the country of Hungary with a group of happy companions that laugh and play away their days in a comfortable sort of ease.

But you wouldn't be seeing the whole story. The hours of teaching others about the restored gospel of Jesus Christ, the rejection, the stacked days and weeks and months of walking the same street inviting everyone they see to listen to something extraordinary, the rejection, the early alarm clock with no sleep-in days, the hours of studying, the phone calls, the rejection, and all of it in a language he is barely beginning to grasp. Those are the things that cannot be pictured in the album, but those are the things that can build him. 

That's the work.

That's why he's there. 

He gets to travel and play and laugh, and

he also gets to be at the crossroads of people's greatest decision.

Will you enter into a covenant relationship with Christ?

Most of them are saying no, but some are saying yes...

And that is enough.

Work hard, my love! And play hard, too.

Tennis and Soccer and Football

Tennis is underway.

And this is Miles staring at me through a tennis racket if you couldn't tell. He is playing singles this year and the competition has been steep, but he finished the regular season seeded 7 (out of maybe 20?), and he's happy about that. Regionals start this week.

He's been reading books on tennis, watching tennis on TV, and practicing at the courts any time anyone will go with him. He even bought himself a $$$ racket and plans to make it part of his forever.

He has exploded in his skill level this season and will return balls that I would have categorized as 'unreturnable.' His serves are fast and furious and his feet are quick and bouncy. 

But the boy drags his toe on each of his serves and wears a hole through the top of his right shoe within days. We explained that we would not be buying him a pair of new tennis shoes every week, so he has taken to wrapping his shoe in white duct tape, which has irritated Coach Huxford because the tape is leaving white, sticky streak marks on the court (you can see it below in the green).

Not sure what he's going to do about that, but certainly new shoes every week is not the solution?

In other news, the earth is repositioning. Which is great news for those of us who are outdoor sports spectators. At the beginning of the tennis season I brought my misting fan and suffered through sweaty clothes underneath a sun umbrella. Now, clouds are filling the skies, rain is (kind of) falling, and temperatures have dropped beneath the Death Zone. "The high is 91 today!" Eliza reported to me excitedly this morning. And, indeed, it feels like we can breathe again. 

Rec soccer came and went for Timothy and Eliza, and we found ourselves even enjoying the evening air as we sat and watched.

It's a good thing, too, us enjoying the evening air, because we sat in it four nights a week through the season. 

Two of those nights were for Eliza - she has a fierceness out on the field that is somewhat surprising given her otherwise timid countenance, but before we get into the meat of her playing, can we please talk about this cute little tennis skirt she loves? 'Cause it got comments through the whole season.

Zipping around the field with that skirt flying in the breeze was pretty adorable. But as much as she loves the skirt, her favorite part of the outfit was the big, blocky number 1 on the back of her jersey. "I'm number ONE!" Could there be anything more delightful? 

Anyway, back to what really matters. 

This girl has some serious goalie skills! 

She's the tiny, blurry goalie in the center of the above picture.  She blocks, runs, dives, kicks, throws... It's pretty impressive, actually. I know that's what goalies do, but the impressive part is that she does it. "She's little," Lisa (a soccer star herself) said at one point, "but she's not afraid! And she has a great read, she's always in the right place... She can't jump very high or stretch very far yet, but if Eliza is physically capable of stopping that ball, she will!" She's little, but she's mighty.

One game, she got kicked in the knee while she was playing center and had to come out for a few minutes with an ice pack, but she went back in (I don't think I can run, but I think I can be goalie?) with tear-stained cheeks and a determined little smile.

At least, that's what Lisa said... Brian and I weren't there that night because we both had youth activities to attend to, which perhaps was for the best. Sometimes it's easier to be brave when your parents aren't around ('cause from my observation she still can't seem to make it to school if she has a hangnail).

The other two nights at the park were for Timothy. He is equally fun to watch. He started the season a leader on his field; focused, determined, and unafraid.

And halfway through, something clicked, he turned up the fire, added a torrent of skill to the mix and proved to himself and to us that he could control the ball quite, quite well. It was fun to watch and to hear the other parents on the sidelines shouting, "Pass to TK! Pass to TK!" He could weave through traffic and had a good eye for passing at just the right time.

He's growing so fast that his bones are betraying him though, and he hobbles around like an old man while he nurses Severs disease (heel pain) and Osgood-schlatter disease (knee pain). Orthotics in his shoes and knee bands under his knees seem to help enough to let him enjoy his sports, but I dare you to watch him coming down the stairs in the morning and not crinkle your eyebrows in pity.

He is also currently playing flag football for the school. But before we leave soccer once and for all this season, let's take a moment to honor the handsome coach of Eliza's team. I wanted to get a shot of him actively coaching his team, which I did, but now I'm thinking it's too bad I don't have at least one of his face. 

I guess he'll just have to coach again next season.

Anyway, on to flag football.

That's happening, too. TK is doing a great job considering how much time he has spent playing football in his life -- which is next to none. Football scares me. It's my favorite sport to watch, but I've seen too much about the long-term negative side effects of playing tackle football for me to feel comfortable giving my kids an easy green light. And none of them have pressed very hard. If I had had a kid who was showing strong aptitude or a burning desire for it I might have reconsidered, but since their interest has been no stronger for football than anything else it was easy for me to say 'choose something else.'

Anyway, it's fun to see him playing out there.

And me?

My sport is spectating. 

There's really no time for much else.

I did take one Saturday morning to bike 18 miles to the IHOP in Henderson and back with the Gnomies.

Originally I had said I would ride my road bike alongside them, but Laurie had an extra electric bike and assured me I would want it. 

Boy was she right. 

Without it, I likely would have missed the whole breakfast and hobbled into IHOP gasping for breath as they calmly prepared to come home. As it was, I got in a nice, moderate workout and kept my breath free for conversation the whole way.

Now I have a rather expensive item on my wish list...

Fall sports are wrapping up, now on to winter!

Pirates In Church

To help the kids get ready for their primary program, Brian and I dressed up like pirates and swaggered into the primary room one Sunday morning. We had heard, you see, about some of the teachings of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and we were interested in learning more. Thankfully we found the room full of primary children, all wearing sticker name-tags that said ‘Missionary in Training,’ who were eager to answer our questions using lyrics from the songs they had learned throughout the year. 

"My poor old grandpa had to walk the plank," Brian said in a grizzled voice, "and got eaten by the sharks. Am I ever going to see him again?" Two small Missionaries in Training looked in their scriptures at the list of printed song titles the primary chorister had stuck inside before saying, "Yes! Families can be together forever!" And the whole primary sang the truth of it.

"All my friends like to plunder and steal gold," I said in a (much less) grizzled voice, "but you're telling me I should not follow their example? Whose example should I follow? Who should I try to be like if I'm not trying to be like my friends?" The next two Missionaries in Training poured over their list of song titles before answering, "Jesus! I'm trying to be like Jesus!" And the whole primary sang.

Song after song, truth after truth, they testified of Christ and taught us how to be more like Him. It was one of the best primary hours I've been to... even though we scared little 3-year-old Hobbes to tears. Turns out he's not used to seeing pirates in church. I texted his mom an apology later that day and asked how he was doing, and she said, “Oh my gosh! Lindsay! He was saying something about  pirates at church today and I was like, ‘what is he even talking about? He must have had a big imagination today,’ ha! This is hilarious.”

No. No imagination needed. There really were pirates at church.

During the program, the primary chorister had one laminated picture of the Pirate Bishop and one laminated picture of Christ. 

“When I hold up the picture of Bishop during the program, that means sing louder,” she instructed the children. “And when I hold up the picture of Jesus, that means sing with more reverence.” She then promised the children that if they did an excellent job in their primary program, there would be a party in which the bishop would walk the plank.

Let me tell you, they did excellently. And Bishop followed through with his end of the deal.

To the Pirates of the Caribbean soundtrack coming from our big speaker and cheers of "Walk the Plank" from almost every primary kid (I think we were only missing 2?), Brian jumped off the rocks in his pirate outfit.

Please take a moment to treasure Eliza in the picture above. 

Brian was such a good sport. The evening before, he had come down with a fever and white spots on the back of his throat. He didn't feel well, but he pounded the antibiotics and ibuprofen and pushed through to make it a fun evening for the kids.

(And don't worry... he kept a good social distance for the night excepting the picture above)

But here’s a glimpse of how he really felt.

The next day, Eliza decided what she wanted to be for Halloween.

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, amiright? 

A Few Reasons to Party

Party news,

We had weather.

A drizzle. 

Actually, is there a word for something that's not quite as intense as a drizzle?

A handful of drops?

That's what we had the other day as we walked to the playground at school.

Definitely not enough to pull out the umbrella, but of course we must seize every opportunity!

When we got into the school line with all the other 3rd graders, Eliza's friend with the thick, bottlenose glasses and long blonde hair ran up to me and said, "Guess WHAT?! My mom? She had to use the wipey things in the car on our drive here! THE WIPEY THINGS! And she's probably going to have to use them ALL DAY!"

Let the party begin!

In other party news, 

Lisa texted me in a bit of a panic. It was Max's birthday, and their themed shirts had not arrived. So, remembering the popcorn shirts I had made for a previous party she asked, "do you have time to print words for me this morning?! We only have two hours!"

Indeed, I do!

I spent the next two hours in my pajamas, racing to produce shirts for their family. Lisa and Jane came to help; measuring, printing, cutting, re-cutting, re-cutting (dang if I would just pay attention the first time), weeding, ironing... and when time had run out we were so close. 

Lisa had to leave to gather her kids from various schools, but just before she got back, Jane and I ironed on the last two decals and bagged up the finished shirts with a high-five. After I waved goodbye (still in my pajamas at 11:30am), I turned around to face the mess we had left behind in my bedroom - scraps of vinyl, plastic cover sheets, ironing materials, Cricut tools - and my heart felt happy, because the mess was a symbol of a morning well spent in the service of a friend. I wish I did more of that.

In other party news,

Brian's parents came down to support him the weekend he was sustained as bishop.

The morning of, his dad gave him the most beautiful blessing full of comfort and specific strengths that will be essential in his new role. Con blessed him with the gift of insight, of compassion, of being able to recognize the direction of the Holy Ghost, and of wisdom. I am grateful to have these two great men in my life. 

Also, these two great women.

If there's one thing that women are generally good at, it's creating. While McKenzie is creating music, Grandma is creating an emotional space between them that they are filling with connection, love, understanding, and growth. Grandma is giving her entire self to McKenzie in this moment, seeing her, supporting her, loving her, cheering her on as she shares her talent, and McKenzie is giving herself to Grandma by sharing her talent, by opening in her vulnerability and letting herself be seen.

All of it creating connection.

I'm grateful to be surrounded by women.

In other party news,

McKenzie went back to college with more of the essentials.

She's has always had a stack of books with her, but this is perhaps going a bit overboard? The amazing thing is, with as busy of a schedule as she has this coming semester, I know she'll find time to read at least that many books by the end of it. And party.

In other party news,

Nertz. We miss our oldest kids around the Nertz table.

Although, fewer decks does make the game more manageable. We don't find a lot of time during our weekdays to play anymore (summer, come back!), but there was a magical 30 minute pocket between dinner and soccer Thursday night that we snatched. And the moral of the night was that you can have a party in 30 minutes or less.

There was a lot of laughter and it felt good.

Partying is a mindset. 

And it's not one that comes very naturally to me. 

Yet.

Challenge accepted.

Love it or Hate it, it Finally Feels Like Home

Fall has a feeling of leery safety around here. Like the feeling you have when you're playing night games and you are the hunted, so you look around corners cautiously, and even when you think you are safe, you don't just bolt out into the open... you inch out of your hiding spot slowly because you're never entirely sure the danger has passed. Fall feels like that. Like, it seems the sun has surrendered its scorching aim, but you don't quite trust it won't change its mind. 

When the highs dropped to the high 90s, we filled our water bottles and inched out of our home to hike the BC on the nearby mountain. It's not so much of a hike as it is a mountain biking trail... and I honestly cannot imagine the courage it would take to get there on a mountain bike. Some of the hills are so steep we could not walk them, we had to crawl down them in a crab-walk or run with a reckless abandon. Maisy came with us (mistake) and refused even to try to walk down some of them, hunkering down to the ground as low as she could (which... how much lower can she get than she already is?). 

We did make it eventually, though. 

This is the 3rd set of letters I have hiked to in my life, and all of them are surprisingly challenging hikes. I guess in order to be able to see the letters from far away, the face of the mountain has to be steep enough.

I was about 10 or 11 when I hiked to the PG in Pleasant Grove, and my younger sister, cousin and I got terribly lost. My older cousins had been responsible for us, but after we made it to the letters, they ran down the mountain much faster than me or Michelle or Karley could, and left us, literally, in their dust. 

I'm sure they were thinking we would be fine as long as we followed the trail back home -- and I'm sure they were right -- except that we did not follow the trail back home. Somehow we lost the trail and ended up blazing our own way down the mountain. Honestly I don't remember much, but I do remember finding a little stream and deciding to follow it down the mountain because we seemed to remember... doesn't a stream follow the easiest path? (Answer: well, yes, the easiest path for a water droplet, but perhaps not for a human.)

We slipped and fell several times on the slippery rocks and ended up with cuts and bruises to prove it. Hurt, crying, muddy, and frightened, we kept following that little stream. I remember scanning the rocks for black panthers because, one: that was my biggest fear at that age, and two: being the oldest, I knew it was my responsibility to fight them off. As the sun set, my fear intensified (how can you see a black panther at night?!). 

At one point Michelle suggested we kneel in the mud to pray.

So we did.

And the one remembered phrase of the day came as we were standing from that prayer. "We can do this, guys!" The words came from my lips and sounded convincing, but I wasn't sure I believed them. 

But, make it down the mountain with the water droplets we did. Emerging out into a large field of grasses.

Lost.

Crying.

Scared.

But at least we weren't slipping anymore.

Very soon after we emerged into this field, we saw two bright headlights aimed straight for us. When we didn't make it to the parking lot, my older cousins had run all the way back up the mountain to find us and were appropriately distraught when we were nowhere along the trail. They then ran back to their car and drove home to get their parents who had presently spotted us and were driving through the field to collect us. I wonder how long they had been searching? I remember the feeling of relief and my aunt's tears when she hugged us.

I'd like to go back to that mountain and find that stream again to see what it's really like. Because in my memory's eye, we were basically like a group of crying heroic Indiana Jones's.

Anyway, nothing of the sort happened on our jaunt up to the BC this week. But there was a lottttttt of loose rock.

Another great thing about fall (and summer and winter and spring) in Boulder City is Lake Mead. Late summer brings monsoon season (which, if you live in a tropical place with actual monsoons, I feel it could be appropriate for you to be slightly offended that we use that term here, too), and with the monsoons come the clouds. Brian and I took the boat out together and ended up in a spectacular sunset on the calmest night. The juxtaposition of the gentle water with the fire and moodiness in the sky was breathtaking to me.

These colors don't even look real!

On a different night, we took some friends to see the Hoover Dam from the backside, and I was delighted that the Desert Princess posed herself like a model for this shot.

So beautifully quaint. 

The rest of the evening was spent surfing and failing at trying 360s.

At some point someone in our family will get it. To be clear, it will not be me.

In other news, Miles and Timothy have decided to be friends.

I'm discovering that some of the best relationships take a lot of time and effort to develop. For Miles and Timothy it's been 12 years, and for me and the desert it's been 11, but we're all starting to come around to each other. And how interesting that learning to love something has a different flavor than simply loving it. 

The complexities make it rich and the work of it makes it deeply satisfying. 

I'm so glad I stuck it out.